I’ve posted before about my feelings about the “Mummy Wars”- basically, I think they’re shite. For some reason, at a time when we should be building each other up, the media seems hell bent on pitting us against each other. And it clearly works, given the amount of nasty and snarky comments I read from hot-headed keyboard warriors in the aftermath.
This week, the social medias were awash with mummy war inducing tripe. Awash. From stay at home mums vs. working mums, to breast is best, and how and where we should be letting our children sleep, the mummy ‘news’ pages did their best to ensure that every mother felt guilty this week. It’s a pretty impressive feat, when you think about it. These pages work so damn hard to make us feel like shithouse parents, and generate so many nasty, unmoderated, mean spirited comments, yet we keep going back for more.
I got caught up in it the other day. I commented in a discussion on a bit of click baity garbage. Soon after someone else commented, and unintentionally (I assume) tore me apart. I don’t even think they had seen what I had written, but their comment essentially labelled me as something that I definitely am not. And it hurt. My feelings were hurt. It was most unpleasant.
I vented to my husband, who looked at me like I had grown an additional head. “Why are you getting upset about throw-away comments from people on the internet?” As much as I hate to admit it, he was right. So I made a decision.
I’m boycotting the Mummy Wars.
Clicky baity news sites, you can keep your ridiculous, shame inducing, nasty comment causing, bullshit. I’m not going to click on your bait. I’m fucking done with it. I don’t wish to read your passive aggressive articles, which are obviously written to ruffle feathers and generate toxicity. “It’s not toxicity, it’s conversation” , you say, but that’s not true. It’s just an outlet for people to bully, hurt, and offend other people. Mums ragging on other mums.
At the end of the day, I don’t care if you want to stay at home with your kids. I don’t care if you choose to work, or have to work, or want to work. If you eat your placenta, lotus your birth, breastfeed your kids until they are in primary school. Feed them organics, feed them fish fingers and frozen peas. It’s OK with me.
Unless it is clear to me that you are physically or emotionally harming your kids, it is not my place to be involved. It’s really not the click bait brigade’s place, either. So, as long as they keep posting shame inducing tripe, I’ll keep boycotting.
Mummy wars are ridiculous wars. While we are wasting our time, bickering over meaningless shit, and belittling complete strangers for simply having a different parenting style to our own, actual bad shit is still happening. Sixty women have lost their lives, this year alone, through acts of violence. Asylum seekers, including women and children, are stuck in island purgatory. These are the issues that we should be outraged about on the internet. Not whether or not another parent feeds their kid toddler formula.
Feel free to stand with me and proudly declare: Fuck you, Mummy Wars! Fuck you, and goodbye! Farewell, and don’t let the door hit you on the arse on the way out! Be gone!
Or don’t. Seriously. I don’t really care.